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Strong Tower Radio

Bob Benson

Vicki Griffin

Balanced Living

Life After Loss Part 1

Creating Connections Part 1

Creating Connections Part 2

Wes Peppers

Engineered For Success

Evelyn Kissinger

Health In a Hurry Part 1

Health in a Hurry Part 2

Hearts on Fire Part 1

The Buzz on Beverages Part 1

The Buzz on Beverages Part 2

The Entertainment Trap

These Doctors Still Make House Calls Part 1

These Doctors Still Make House Calls Part 2

Ron Kelly

Super Foods That Fight Cancer Part 1

Super Foods That Fight Cancer Part 2

Who Can I Trust? Part 1

Who Can I Trust? Part 2

Life After Loss Part 2

Alcohol: Why Not? Part 1

Exercise, It Goes to Your Head Part 1

Exercise, It Goes to Your Head Part 2

Healthy Weight Helps

Hearts on Fire Part 2


Hi, my name is Pastor Ron Kelly. I'm your host today in this segment of Balanced Living for a Better Life. My guest today is Vicki Griffin, the director of Lifestyle Matters, author, speaker, and health educator. Our topic today touches on every life and is more timely than ever. Today we're addressing the question, who can I trust?

What are the mental, physical, and spiritual implications of trust? Thank you so much for having me, Pastor Ron. What an incredibly important subject we're addressing today. I don't think there's any doubt that we're living in times of enormous increased stress and uncertainty, you know? Welcome to the information age.

We are daily flooded with an avalanche of undigested data being shrapneled with information bits, endless inroads to privacy, and we even pay for security systems to protect our security systems, blizzards of passwords encrypted to protect multitudes of media and money accounts. But it seems like we're more vulnerable than ever. Yeah, it's a pretty overwhelming age. There's all kinds of things that are coming at us and just trying to manage them is a stress all by itself. Exactly.

And on top of that, as a pastor, you know this, that betrayals, loss, and failed relationships, they're exponentially growing and it causes a loss of trust. Yeah, we think in our new age of discovering our liberty and our license that we're gaining more but we're actually losing all the time. Well it is so true. The challenges of life, I know you've experienced this, I've heard your testimony and in my own, the challenges of life can either make a person isolated and bitter or balanced and better able to participate in this tricky life of ours. So how we handle hardships has more to do with mental, physical, and spiritual health than many realize.

Yes, and having somewhere to go, you know. This trust is really something. We've got to have somebody that's trustworthy to lean on, that's dependable, someone somewhere. So how would you define trust? Well, trust is something that builds into a relationship when you know you can have confidence.

You've got some security that comes out of a relationship or some set of circumstances, So there's trust as a dynamic of developing confidence in that person. So we would say then that it's kind of a calm reliance in the ability, strength, or dependability of something or someone? Yes. You know, Trust doesn't mean a lack of boundaries though, and you and your wife are in the counseling work as well. So trust does not mean being naive, gullible, or permitting abuse.

It's really the opposite. Yeah, exactly. And the things you do that allow you to get out of that realm and be in a realm of dependability, those life skills, they actually do create trust. But if you keep playing back into the dynamics where there's dysfunction, you'll be in a deepening cycle of distrust. It was so wonderful to me to learn when I became a Christian that God has boundaries.

Picture frames are boundaries, rooms have borders, yards have boundaries, Jesus had boundaries, and he teaches his children a sensible and wise trust. So it's a steadfast confidence in who God is, who he's created us to be, and his building plan for our lives. Absolutely, and his law lays down where those boundaries are at, which gives a person the highest level of confidence and security in a relationship. So the question is, is it possible to be steadfast and stable in a world that is just the opposite? Well, absolutely.

And I think that's 1 of the most beautiful things that opens up a door of introducing people to the rock that we live by and stand on. So true, because I want to be that stable, steadfast person. And there's a saying that the sea may be stormy, but if the water isn't filling your boat, you'll make it to port. In other words, stability and trust have more to do with what's in us than what surrounds us. Absolutely.

So, chronic mistrust is linked to a number of physical, mental, and spiritual maladies, including reduced immune function and greater risk for premature death and disease. Well, you know, trust is a stressor on the system. Yeah, mental attitudes, I have known in my own life that the way I am perceiving something can be more stressful and more upsetting than the event itself. So mental attitude significantly influences the activity and the strength actually of natural killer cells. Well this is a biological phenomena we understand today because of advanced science but it's always been in place and this is why Jesus knew to challenge us, trust him and not worry.

Well that's a really good point because the brain-body link is just incredibly strong and when Plato brought in the idea, the philosophy, that there's a higher part of man that is separate from the body, that is trapped in the body like something in a piece of luggage. It really did violence to what the Bible teaches about the fact that you don't have a soul. We are souls, and we can't separate these things. Yes, which makes relationships so important in our physical health as well. Absolutely.

Early in the last century, Ellen White observed, the relation that exists between the mind and the body is very intimate. When 1 is affected, the other sympathizes. Grief, anxiety, discontent, remorse, guilt, and distrust all tend to break down the life forces and invite decay and death. But on the other hand, courage, hope, sympathy, being other-centered builds confidence. It builds strength, immune function, and mental health.

Yeah, you know, we're a walking chemistry lab, and our brains affect us so much. So these dynamics of trust play themselves out in many ways. Well, it is so true, and it's so interesting that trust is hardwired in young children. And it's vital to not only individual health, but also social stability and children who are violated. Children, youth, and adults who lack trust have increased levels of loneliness, addiction, and social isolation that are linked to depression and poor health.

So it's a beautiful thing that Jesus invites us to be his children and our communions of religious fellowship become important to reestablishing that trust, not only with God, but with each other. Kimberlie Kranich I was thinking the other day about the story of Job, and Job is so instructive because it was the first book written in the Bible by Moses in the land of Midian, and it addresses the issue of trust when everything is going wrong. And Satan accuses God and says, haven't you put a hedge around him? And I was thinking about that, because even when everything went wrong, When his children lost their lives, they were killed, he lost his property, he lost his reputation, he became ill, his wife was so filled with grief she suggested that he commit suicide, and yet Job's trust was unbroken. He knew his God even though he was thrown into perplexity.

And as I was thinking about this, he still had a hedge around him. When everything went south, when it all went wrong, that hedge was still there. There's a saying that if Christ brings you to it, He'll bring you through it. Yeah, Job had such a deep trust in God that he could endure immense amounts of grief and misunderstanding or proper understanding about, or just a lack of knowing what's going on behind the scenes, but he trusted God so much. You know, there's a saying that I really resonate with.

It was a sign I saw on an executive's desk and it said, you're smiling because you don't understand the situation. But now I know that God does understand the situation. And what time I am afraid, the Bible says, I can trust in him. Well, I'm thinking of that song, with Jesus in the vessel, I can smile at the storm. And it may be a little forced at times, but that's all right.

That's part of the battle. So the healthiest social relationships are marked by trust, cooperation, and fairness. It doesn't mean your friends are flawless, but trusting relationships with health care providers, with our friends, with church associates, and with those who are around us, those are going to shape our worldview and how we navigate through the trials of life. Yeah, and having a deep commitment to those things is how you get greater trust, because you work through problems in the relationships, and you get an increasing confidence. That's a great point, because I've learned that time alone with God really inspires me.

But when I'm with others, That's when the flaws float to the top. That's when we have to work through problems. That's God's laboratory to help me to grow Right and Paul says love is the bond of perfection and that love creates the ultimate security It's not just transcendent with God, but it's with each other So This quality of trust is actually an attitudinal discipline, not a feeling, it's not naivety, and it has physical ramifications. Increased trust is linked to better overall health and healthier social ties. So positive relationships nurture increased trust.

And it doesn't mean that these relationships are flawless, but it does mean that they are fruitful and there's a big difference. Yeah, they're built on the truth of God's love for us and the truth of how to live. Yes. I mean, no relationship is problem-free because people are not problem-free, but there are no problem-free candidates. But healthy relationships promote positive growth in both people, mentally, physically, emotionally, and most importantly, spiritually.

Especially if you have a commitment to the relationship where you get past the hurdles that stand as obstacles between people. Exactly, that is exactly right. So have you experienced how being treated kindly seems to speed recovery? Well, you know, when I'm sick and I'm laying there with a fever, the kind words of my wife, the kind touches of my wife, the beauty of her affection to me is such a boost and just feeling and knowing I'm loved and cared for is a real aid. That's right.

And you know, our listener, we may have listeners out there who are single, but they're not sidelined. The Bible says he places his children in family. He sets the solitary in family. He is a friend to the friendless, and he abhors the affliction of the afflicted. And we are living in a society where people are more isolated than ever before.

I read a dissertation on social pain, and it's very interesting that the words that we use for inner pain are the same as the somatic words that we use. So, you've broken my heart, I'm injured, I'm wounded, you're a pain in the neck. These things are somatic expressions for inner pain. So being set aside, devalued, all of these things break down trust. But think about the first bonding of an infant.

It's being touched. And so when someone is kind, like you just shared, you touched me, I'm warmed by you. And so God will compensate for those who are alone. And He calls us to care for 1 another and to learn how to trust. We need the healing influence of other people in our lives.

We do, but that does take a commitment because you've got to press through the discomfort stages to get into the comfort zones. Yes, but haven't you experienced and seen in your work as a minister and counselor that when people work through grave difficulties and misunderstandings, if both people are willing, or if the team is willing, or if the group is willing, that you reach a deeper level of perspective, a deeper level of relationship. It's like exercising a muscle, you strain it, it comes back strong. It's so interesting because even team attitudes of trust at work are linked with less sickness and absenteeism and better service. So those who actually believe that people can change and improve are more able to forgive and trust others and forgiveness of ourselves, of others, and even, well, do I dare say there are times we need to say, Lord, I don't understand you, but you're bigger than me and you're going to get me through this grief, this brokenness, this fiery trial, this disappointment, this crushing event in my life.

Yes, we have to reconcile even our relationship with God at times. We do, and there's different chapters and different seasons. So in those seasons when we're not under stress and we're not in the midst of grief, we're experiencing the ballast that what keeps the relationship steady. It's in the bottom of the boat. We can make it through the challenging chapters.

That is such an important point because what we learn in the light, what we learn when things are at peace, whether it's lifestyle habits, whether it's attitudinal strengths, whether it's Bible study and the verses about God that we learn, it is those things that we will take into the crisis. Because when you're in a crisis, you're not going to learn anything new. You're going to be on automatic pilot. And so learning to trust God when it's all good preps us. It's that ballast that you're talking about, to feel his presence when things are dark.

So when you make a mistake, do you believe that with God's help, you can change and move forward? Do you have a friend you can trust to help you in times of need? Proverbs 17, 17 says, A friend is loving at all times and becomes a brother in times of trouble. So God really wants us to have a mindset of encouragement for others and for each other, and to listen and be available to those around us. Yeah, we're leaky vessels.

We need a lot of encouragement. I think of Peter in that storm. You know, Jesus was up on that mountain praying for those disciples when they were out in that storm in the Sea of Galilee, and Peter had faith to step out of that boat. Jesus called him, but he didn't have the faith to get through that storm. But Jesus was there for him.

He reached out and it's in the storm when we cry out to God that he will reach up and restore us in the midst of that storm. You're exactly right. Well, this has been a great discussion so far. Let's pick this up again in just a second. You

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Balanced Living

Who Can I Trust? Part 1

Parent Series

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Other Teachings in Series

Life After Loss Part 1

Creating Connections Part 1

Creating Connections Part 2

Engineered For Success

Health In a Hurry Part 1

Health in a Hurry Part 2

Hearts on Fire Part 1

The Buzz on Beverages Part 1

The Buzz on Beverages Part 2

The Entertainment Trap

These Doctors Still Make House Calls Part 1

These Doctors Still Make House Calls Part 2

Super Foods That Fight Cancer Part 1

Super Foods That Fight Cancer Part 2

Who Can I Trust? Part 1

Who Can I Trust? Part 2

Life After Loss Part 2

Alcohol: Why Not? Part 1

Exercise, It Goes to Your Head Part 1

Exercise, It Goes to Your Head Part 2

Healthy Weight Helps

Hearts on Fire Part 2

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